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I will never be cool enough to…

June 13, 2010

Ok so if you are easily offended or don’t have any sense of humor don’t read this…

Here is a list of things that I will never be cool enough to do.

  • I will never be cool enough to…
  • Straighten my hair.
  • Put a Monster sticker on my car.
  • Take a half nude picture of me in a bathroom with my cell phone.
  • Post drunked pictures from the weekend on Facebook. (I don’t drink)
  • Drive with one hand on the wheel, sitting so far back in my seat that I can barely see over the dash.
  • Wear extra small tee shirts that say Tapout or Affliction on them.
  • To buy a specialty drink from anywhere other than a Starbucks, Panera, or Caribou.
  • Get  any tattoo that has to do with tribal or Chinese lettering. Also throw into that barbed wire tattoo.
  • Grow a soul patch or a Fu Manchu. :C
  • Wear Animal Rubber bands or Doodle Bandz.
  • Put a rebel flag on the back of my pick up, mud flaps with women silhouettes on them, or hanging inappropriate “male parts” off of the hitch.
  • Want to be Swedish.
  • Use Windows 7… or anything for that matter.
  • Grow a mullet.
  • Drive a smart car, a VW Bug with matching flower, or anything that is burnt orange.
  • Be like Jess Simonic!

This post was co- written with my good friend Jessica Simonic.

What would you add to the list? Go on make us laugh!

4 Comments leave one →
  1. June 13, 2010 6:34 pm

    Good stuff bro,
    I will never be cool enough to:
    Drive a Hummer
    Own a Mac
    Where tight jeans
    To understand the Twilight books/movies
    That’s all I can think of, lol

    • Benjamin Davis permalink*
      June 13, 2010 9:30 pm

      Great thoughts! Although I got to say…

      I own a Mac, wear tight jeans and I “want” to understand the Twilight Books/ movies.

  2. June 14, 2010 4:56 pm

    I would have to reply that I would never be cool enough to be Ben Davis,lol

  3. Jess Simonic permalink
    June 15, 2010 9:54 pm

    Mmhmm… Very well written. This is beautiful,

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